• Wanker. Git. Prick. Prat. Dick. Eejit. Plonker. Pillock. Nincompoop. Bellend. Halfwit. Dolt. Chump. Nitwit. Moron. ****wit. Simpleton. Lunatic. Dork. Numskull. Idiot. All lovely... but... nah... I prefer Twat. It's neat and it's accurate somehow. Because, yes, I am a Twat sometimes. Aren't we all? THE TWAT FILES are my stories of the times when I've been a total, utter twat. Time and time again, I've been a massive eejit. But the more I think about it, the more I understand that the moments where I've made mistakes, misunderstood stuff and messed up are key. That's where all my learning happens and where I laugh the most. Being a twat is universal and my twatishness is no different to yours. Except perhaps, that mine has been horrifyingly public on occasion. My hope is that reading these stories of my twattishness might remind you of just what a massive twat you also are, that we might celebrate and revel in this most delightful of traits, together.
  • It's that time of year again . . . With his signature wit, Brian Bilston returns with And So This is Christmas, fifty-one poems in celebration of the festive season: from bizarre family traditions to the office Christmas party; from voting day for turkeys to the impossible art of gift-giving. So hang your stockings, grab your mistletoe and curl up with this heart-warming collection of Christmas crackers.
  • Loosen up with a smile on your face... Marion Deuchars has practiced yoga for many years, and well knows the benefits it brings. Now she shares that passion with her illustrated character Bob the Bird, whose expressive poses will charm you into a reviving session of yoga breathing, stretching, posing, and mindfulness. Yoga for Stiff Birds rejects the cliches of studio photography in favour of a more immediate, inviting, look. With a few brush strokes Marion helps Bob into every position from the downward-facing dog to the tree; both useful and inspiring, her art will raise a smile, whether you're a regular practitioner or a yoga novice, and will encourage even the creakiest reader to breathe, stretch, and bend like they never have before.
  • "This book is great because it covers everything in existence apart from the 95% of stuff not worth bothering with" - Philomena Cunk, star of Charlie Brooker's Weekly Wipe, Moments of Wonder and Cunk on Earth, Cunk & Other Humans... Once in a blue moon, a book comes along that changes the world. The Origin of Species. War and Peace. 1984. The World According to Danny Dyer. And now, Cunk on Everything: The Encyclopedia Philomena, by Philomena Cunk. Philomena Cunk is one of the greatest thinkers of the 21st century, and in Cunk on Everything she turns her attention to our biggest issue: why are there so many books? Wouldn't it be better if there was just one? This is that book - an encyclopedia of ALL HUMAN KNOWLEDGE, from sausages to Henry of Eight to Brush Strokes to vegetarian sausages. Read it, and you'll never have to read another book again. 'This is a book' Philomena Cunk 'Never contact me again' Professor Rupert Delgado, MBE 'This book is absolutely stupid' The Pool
  • Online romance fraud is a problem across the globe. It causes financial and emotional devastation, yet many people refuse to take it seriously. This is the story of one middle-aged woman in a cardigan determined to understand this growing phenomenon. No other woman has had so many online romances - from Keanu Reeves to Brad Pitt to Prince William - and Becky Holmes is a favourite among peacekeeping soldiers and oil rig workers who desperately need iTunes vouchers. By winding up scammers and investigating the truth behind their profiles, Becky shines a revealing, revolting and hilarious light on a very shady corner of the internet. Featuring first-hand accounts of victims, examples of scripts used by fraudsters, a look into the psychology of fraud and of course plenty of Becky's hysterical interactions with scammers, this is a must-read for anyone who needs a reminder that Keanu Reeves is NOT in love with them.
  • 100 horticultural head-scratchers to test your botanical brain powerCan you tell Myosotis from Magnolia? Can you tell your beeches from your birches?Featuring 100 puzzles including crosswords, word searches, anagrams, word wheels and code breakers, The Gardeners’ World Puzzle Book has everything you need to unwind from a long day in the garden while sharpening your mind at the same time. Organised by season and difficulty, this fun and beautiful book offers everything from easy breezy brainteasers to the thorniest of horticultural headscratchers – the perfect companion for any grower! As seen at our Bord Bia Bloom 2024 bookstall.
  • 'This book had sex with my brain!' SARA PASCOE 'Hilarious. Intimate. Vital.' JAMEELA JAMIL 'I couldn't put the book down!' LAURA BATES Comedian Sofie Hagen has not had sex in 3,000 days (and counting). And it turns out, she's not the only one... In an attempt to find out why we're not having the sex we want, Sofie asks the questions: can we blame a lacking sex education? Is it all just sexual trauma? Where's the radical sexual liberation we were promised? What are we going to do about this? Should she have slept with that guy in that bush that one time? How do you overcome being a 35-year-old virgin (when it comes to queer sex, that is)? How do the socially awkward and the neurodiverse have sex? In Will I Ever Have Sex Again?, Sofie Hagen explores the quirks and difficulties of being an 'involuntary celibate' (but one of the feminist, progressive ones). With a blend of memoir and conversations with experts, therapists, sex workers, porn stars, comedians and public figures, this is a humorous and bold undertaking to gain a better understanding of how we can think, talk and feel about sex. 'I was expecting a tad more tahini' YOTTAM OTTOLENGHI
  • From the author of What I Lick Before Your Face comes this hilarious companion, Please Stop Touching Me ... and Other Haikus by Cats. Jamie Coleman returns with this brilliant collection of feline flights of fancy. His hilarious haikus take us inside the minds of our most popular pets revealing their inner-most secrets, their disdain for their owners and the poetry that is common to all cats. Featuring over 50 haikus complete with glorious images, this is a hysterical gift for cat lovers, cat haters, and poetry enthusiasts alike. ISBN 9781787632677
  • The first book in twenty-five years from Jerry Seinfeld features his best work across five decades in comedy. Since his first performance at the legendary New York nightclub Catch a Rising Star as a twenty-one-year-old student in autumn of 1975, Jerry Seinfeld has written his own material and saved everything. 'Whenever I came up with a funny bit, whether it happened on a stage, in a conversation, or working it out on my preferred canvas - the big yellow legal pad - I kept it in one of those old-school accordion folders,' Seinfeld writes. 'So I have everything I thought was worth saving from forty-five years of hacking away at this for all I was worth.' For this book, Jerry Seinfeld has selected his favourite material, organised decade by decade. In page after hilarious page, one brilliantly crafted observation after another, readers will witness the evolution of one of the great comedians of our time and gain new insights into the thrilling but unforgiving art of writing stand-up comedy. ISBN 9781471195587
  • With contributions by: William Boyd, Candice Carty-Williams, Imtiaz Dharker, Roddy Doyle, Pico Iyer, Robert Macfarlane, Andy Miller, Jackie Morris, Jan Morris, Sisonke Msimang, Dina Nayeri, Chigozie Obioma, Michael Ondaatje, David Pilling, Max Porter, Philip Pullman, Alice Pung, Jancis Robinson, S.F.Said, Madeleine Thien, Salley Vickers, John Wood and Markus Zusak. 'This story, like so many stories, begins with a gift. The gift, like so many gifts, was a book...' So begins the essay by Robert Macfarlane that inspired this collection. In this cornucopia of an anthology, you will find essays by some of the world's most beloved novelists, nonfiction writers, essayists and poets. 'You will see books taking flight in flocks, migrating around the world, landing in people's hearts and changing them for a day or a year or a lifetime. You will see books sparking wonder or anger; throwing open windows into other languages, other cultures, other minds; causing people to fall in love or to fight for what is right. And more than anything, over and over again, you will see books and words being given, received and read - and in turn prompting further generosity.' Published to coincide with the 20th anniversary of global literacy non-profit, Room to Read, The Gifts of Reading forms inspiring, unforgettable, irresistible proof of the power and necessity of books and reading. ISBN 9781474615679
  • From renowned, Pulitzer Prize-winning literary critic, Michiko Kakutani, comes an inspiring and gorgeously illustrated selection of the life-changing books that none of us should miss 'Why do we love books so much?' For legendary literary critic Michiko Kakutani, books have always been an escape and a sanctuary, the characters of some novels feeling so real to her childhood self that she worried they might leap out of the pages at night if she left the book cover open. In Ex Libris, she offers a personal selection of over 100 works of fiction, nonfiction and poetry, with passionate essays on why each has had a profound effect on her life. From Homer's The Odyssey to The Writings and Speeches of Martin Luther King, Jr., and Margaret Atwood's The Handmaid's Tale to Elena Ferrante's Neapolitan Novels, Ex Libris covers a rich and vast range of classics, old and new, that will help build a well-rounded reader and citizen of the world. With gorgeous illustrations by lettering artist Dana Tanamachi that evoke vintage bookplates leafed between Kakutani's inspiring essays, Ex Libris points us to our next great read - and proves an unmissable reminder of why we fell in love with reading in the first place. ISBN 9780008421953
  • This title is only available on special order import from the USA. You should allow 3 weeks for delivery. An indispensable and distinctive book that will help anyone who wants to write, write better, or have a clearer understanding of what it means for them to be writing, from widely admired writer and teacher Verlyn Klinkenborg. Klinkenborg believes that most of our received wisdom about how writing works is not only wrong but an obstacle to our ability to write. In Several Short Sentences About Writing, he sets out to help us unlearn that "wisdom"--about genius, about creativity, about writer's block, topic sentences, and outline--and understand that writing is just as much about thinking, noticing, and learning what it means to be involved in the act of writing. There is no gospel, no orthodoxy, no dogma in this book. Instead it is a gathering of starting points in a journey toward lively, lucid, satisfying self-expression. ISBN 9780307279415
  • **THE PERFECT GIFT FOR OUR TROUSERLESS TIMES** Office workers of the world, unite! (remotely.) You have nothing to lose but your trousers. Working from home has liberated many of us from the annoyances of office life. We no longer need to queue for the photocopier, we don't have to endure long commutes and - best of all - we don't have to wear any trousers. But it's not all sunshine and trouser-free happiness at home. We have to stay awake during endless virtual meetings, our after-work pint in the pub has become an online company quiz night and if the milk runs out there's no one to blame but ... well, you know who. I'm Not Wearing Any Trousers is here to cheer your WFH days, with tips on how to recreate the fun of a sweaty train commute, how to cope with children/animals photobombing your presentation to the board and how to maximise productivity (for al least five minutes, anyways). So roll up your sleeves, take off your trousers and zoom through these pages! ISBN 9780008458737
  • The long-awaited, rambling, tender, and very funny memoir from Adam Buxton. Ramble / ramb(a)l/ Verb 1. walk for pleasure in the countryside. 'Dr Buckles and Rosie the dog love rambling in the countryside.' 2. talk or write at length in a confused or inconsequential way. Ramble Book is about parenthood, boarding school trauma, arguing with your partner, bad parties, confrontations on trains, friendship, wanting to fit in, growing up in the 80s, dead dads, teenage sexual anxiety, failed artistic endeavours, being a David Bowie fan; and how everything you read, watch and listen to as a child forms a part of the adult you become. It's also a book about the joys of going off topic and letting your mind wander. And it's about a short, hairy, frequently confused man called Adam Buxton. ISBN 9780008293338
  • In the beginning was the Word. Now there's PowerPoint. It's used for weddings, warfare and webinars, for literature, lessons and law. And, of course, to tell everyone that Q4 is going to be a lot more challenging than Q3. PowerPoint is probably the most successful piece of software in history - but do you know who invented it? Or why it's banned in American courtrooms? Or which Pulitzer Prize-winning novel has a chapter entirely in PowerPoint? At its heart, PowerPoint is about presentation, theatre and culture. About how to think, create and persuade. And it's hated and loved in equal measure for reasons that tell us a lot about power and who gets to say what where. All of life is somewhere in a PowerPoint slide. Come inside to find out why. ISBN 9781788167376
  • What if your pets could play D&D? And what if they were... kind of jerks about it? If there are two things all geeks love, it's roleplaying games, and their pets. So why not fuse the two? It's time to grab your dice, dust off that character sheet, and let your cat or dog (or guinea pig, or iguana, or budgie) accompany you on an epic adventure! It'll be great! ... unless you have pets like these. ISBN 9781781089224
  • Over 2,000 years of history seen through the eyes of 50 extraordinary women. Was Jane Austen a fan of her own work? What did Harriet Tubman want to tell Abraham Lincoln? And how did Greta Thunberg respond to her critics? This carefully curated selection of correspondence on politics, literature, art, entertainment, activism and science provides insight into the personal and professional lives of some of history's most influential names. Each entry includes images and transcripts of the letters themselves along with a biography by celebrated historian Lucinda Hawksley exploring the lives and writings of each woman. Letters of Great Women brings together 50 key female voices on the most significant moments in history, and the everyday joys, sorrows and struggles of women's lives. ISBN 9781787394490
  • As an eternally curious outsider, Maeve Higgins can see that the United States is still an experiment. Some parts work well and others really don’t, but that doesn't stop her from loving the place and the people that make it. With piercing political commentary in a sweet and salty tone, these essays unearth answers to the questions we all have about this country we call home; the beauty of it all and the dark parts too. Maeve attends the 2020 Border Security Expo to better understand the future of our borders, and finds herself at The Alamo surrounded by queso and homemade rifles. A chance encounter with a statue of a teenage horseback rider causes her to interrogate the purpose of monuments, this sends her hurtling through the past, connecting Ireland’s revolutionary history with the struggles of Black Americans today. And after mistaking edibles for innocent candies, Maeve gets way too high at Paper Source. Most of all, Maeve wants to leave this country and this planet better than she found it. That may well be impossible, but it certainly means showing love. Lots of it, even when it's difficult to do so. Threaded through these pieces is love for strangers, love for friends who show up right on time, love for trees, love for Tom Hardy, love for those with differing opinions, love for the glamorous older women of Brighton Beach with tattooed eyeliner and gold jewelry, love for everybody on this train. ISBN 9780143135869

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